Which one is smaller

The bus to Esteli was a school bus
but i didn´t learn a thing
there were two guys behind us
they were like the puppets who sat in the balcony
disliking everything
it´s true what they say

what you don´t know can´t hurt you
sometimes

we finished with spanish class
and then we interviewed the teachers for the doc
jania´s teacher was a girl during the revolution
all the other kids got to join the army
she was mad that she didn´t

in nicaragua the electricity is privatized
like it is in Alberta
the City can´t afford to light up the public square
it´s mostly dark
a social resource missing
in a town where bars are for the rich

they all agree that a fetus is a living being
they all agree the new abortion law punishes only the poor
i am glad not to have grown up in stife
but what thoughtful people a generation of strife creates

at the revolution musem
the curator lives in a room in the back
we showed up to shoot
and he was in the shower
he showed us a jail
where the government took prisoners
hung them upside down in water
electrified the water
pulled out their teeth
150 prisoners
in a space smaller
than the Varscona Men´s Dressing room

he took us to the roof
to show us where the army shot at unarmed students
the square is beautiful
with volancoes behind
Mobotumbo and Mombotombito

to show which one is smaller

then we went to Esteli
i ventured from the bus
into the crazy bus station market
i spoke Spanish
felt indpendent
bought three cheese biscuits
and a fried banana with cheese
it doesn´t sound like it would be good
but it so was

yesterday we interviewed
the leading primitivist painter
in Nicaragua
they had a rough Christmas this year
the kids were crying
while we were talking his wife went to buy us drinks
so poor
and yet so kind
during the interview i had mic problems
i had forgotten batteries
i almost cried
we have his words at least
his art
i hope i can salvage something
pay tribute to this amazing talent

the painter in his doorway

In Esteli we saw the Museo de Madres
set up by the Mothers of the men who died in the revolution
there are pctures of every single one
except when there are no pictures
then its a piece of clothing
the name pinned on top
pictures of yourself are a privledge

that´s why models are so rich

we shoot there at ten tommorrow
the director of the Museum said my work was important
that scared me

a lot

at dinner we met two airplane mechanics who are driving
from San Salvador to Panama City
on motorcycles
i talked politics with them
trying not to offend
i didn´t offend

who to offend and who not to
is an artistic choice
that i have always made bravely
why then

do i always avoid it face to face?